Thursday, March 19, 2009

Black Flies Post #6

Rutkovsky doesn't make it out ok. In fact, he doesn't make it out at all. He shot himself in the face at a park near the station. This way, he knew members from where he worked would find him, but Ollie, the one who treated him, didn't recognize him at all. He describes him here (WARNING: VERY DISCRIPTIVE!): "One eye, like a ball, hung by its ganglia, the tongue was only attached by a narrow isthmus of flesh, and the face, or the place where you would normally look for the face, was a blasted, ragged, unrecognizable mess of red meat with a hole where the mouth should have been. The guy's upper airway was relatively undamaged....As I did chest compressions blood oozed from his face, ran in rivulets down the tube, and bubbled from his ears"(148). Keep in mind, Rutkovsky did this to himself. He wanted people to know how much he had been hurt by what had happen. He couldn't live with what he had done and with how the mother got off like what she did was ok. He couldn't take it so he committed suicide. Ollie took this very hard. He went back to work with LaFontaine. This man was sick and disgusting. He was powerhungry. Ollie describes working with him here: "Every time I worked with LaFontaine he'd do some f*****-up thing to the unconcious or the helpless patients....I didn't join him, but I didn't stop him either....Really, without knowing it, I was getting worse"(162). He had to stop working with LaFontaine. He started working with Verdis and he still acted like he was with LaFontaine. But eventually, he returned back to his normal state of mind. He even got his first save (bringing someone back to life). He was a hero. That was during his last month of working as an EMT. He had gotten into medical school. That is where the book ends.
This book was horrifying and eye-opening at the same time. I could really see the toll being an EMT took on the people. I could see the stupid things people did to themselves and the irony in having to save them so they could OD again. I could see the struggles people went through everyday and how different people dealt with it. While Rutkovsky didn't make it, and LaFontaine had his own issues, Ollie survived. Verdis was a good medic too. There still were good medics out there. I believe it's all about how people deal with stress, anxiety, and trauma. I think Ollie handled it well. After all, he survived. I would definately recommend this book. While it is gory and bloody, it doesn't sugar-coat the truth, which is nice every once in a while.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Black Flies Post #5

Al of the EMT work has made Ollie and Rut too nonchalant when it comes to stressful, depressing emergency calls. They arrive at a room with a woman, who had just given birth to a "still born" child lying on the floor, inside, who was "trying to cut the twisted umbilical cord with the jagged end of a broken crack pipe"(114). Ollie attended to the mother and Rut attended to the "dead" child. Rut cut the umbilical cord and left the room with the baby. He came back very soon after however. The cops arrived and asked about the baby's condition. Ollie said it was a stillborn, but the cop thought he saw it breathing. Ollie meanwhile finds out that the woman was HIV positive and decided not to take her pills for it to keep the baby from getting it either. Also, she was a crackhead and took methadone. No wonder the baby was born 7 and a half months early. Anyways, another precinct's ambulences show up and ask about the baby. Rut shows them the way to it in the hallway, under some towels. Rut and Ollie finish up with the mother, but they, or should i say Rut, is stopped on their way out. A lieutenant stopped Rut and asked for his badge. Rut asked why and the man simply responded, "That dead baby is breathing"(118). Both Ollie and Rut were questioned and Rut was released from duty for good.
In this situation, both the mother and the baby lived. It's hard to blame Rutkovsky for this situation. While he was to blame, I think there were other factors that hold more blame than he does. First of all, even the mother thought the baby was dead. I'm not saying that her viewpoint should be trusted. After all Rut was the EMT here, but any person would think the baby was dead. Second of all, any baby born into the world like that has a high high high probability of being still born. Lastly, the whole EMT job makes people go crazy. It puts an extreme amount of stress on a person. EMTs act like heros, but they are not superheroes. They will and do make mistakes. No one died in this situation which is good for Rut. I think it will possibly help him "recover" from what happened. I feel really bad for him. I am angry at the mother for acting like a complete idiot and i think she has some blame on her as well. Overall however, Rutkovsky undoubtedly made a mistake. I just hope he makes it out ok.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Black Flies Post #4

Ollie and the other EMTs continue to see and get used to seeing extremely disgusting things. I'm not talking about a broken arm, a single gun shot or anything like that. I'm talking about seeing eyeballs laying on the ground while still attached to someones body. Or even intestines falling out of people's bodies and into their own hands. Horror movie kinds of things. But they are used to it. Ollie's everyday routine is filled with these kinds of situations. Ollie describes the normalcies of his day by saying it is filled, "Of seeing the skull beneath the scalp, the brain beneath the skull"(91). He continues, "Of seeing the chest open and the heart still beating with an unreal, spastic sort of motion, like a separate living thing"(91). Those kinds of images are things normal people would never ever EVER forget seeing. But this is an everyday occurence for them. To them, these types of occurences are forgettable.
So far, this book has truly opened my eyes to the world of EMTs and doctors. These people save the lives of others and sacrifice a part of them to do it. It is an incredible burden for people to have to see these types of things everyday of their lives. I couldn't do it. My dad used to be an EMT. I don't even think he made it a year before he quit. He told me it was just too much. I'm sure he saw things he wish he hadn't. This type of job clearly isn't for everyone. I know, like my dad, that I couldn't take it. I have to run out of a room and stick my fingers in my ears if someone throws up. I can't even imagine being stuck in an ambulence with someone who is severly injured and needs my help - I just couldn't do it. I admire all of the EMTs and doctors out there. This book has really made me appreciate what they do.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Black Flies Post #3

In this part of the book, the EMT's and police's mental issues are brought to light even more. Ollie has a new nickname now, one to replace his old one as "the Coroner". His new nickname is "Cross". While it is nothing special, it is still better than his old one. Anyways, back to the mental issues. A perfect example is when Rut, Ollie, and a policeman, Pastori, are eating lunch in the squadcar. A kid walks by, looks at them, and spits on the ground. Pastori calls the kid over, gets the kids superior, and makes him beat up the kid that spit. The kid's nose was bleeding, he was moaning, and he would surely never do it again. But Pastori made the other guy keep beating him up. Soon, the kid was unconcious on the sidewalk in his own blood. Rut finally jumps out of the car and calls down another ambulence. Pastori says, "Guess Rut's feeling generous today"(60). How disgusting is that? It is also very disturbing knowing that the people our communities trust to keep them safe and to stop violence are the ones creating trouble. Ollie is mad at himself for just sitting there, doing nothing although he knew it was wrong. I would be mad at myself too.
Later, Ollie calls his girlfriend Clara. She pesters him to explain what happened at work that day. When he explains the incident above, he said that a "skel" got beat up really bad. She asked what a skel was and he responded, "A skel is someone who deserves it"(61). She replies, "Only three months and you've already become one of them"(61). I tend to disagree with her on that one. While Ollie is getting more accustomed to the atrocities that occur at work, I do not think is agrees with it happening. He still very much has the "gut check" that lets you know when something thats going on is wrong. I do not believe the other workers, like Pastori, have that anymore. They have learned to take out their frustration and anxiety about their job on others. Ollie doesn't do that. I look forward to seeing if he continues to act this way or if he truly does become "one of them".

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Black Flies Post #2

At the beginning of the chapter, Ollie continues to not fit in 100%, but he is doing better. The other EMTs continue to make life a little harder for him. One thing I am noticing about all the EMTs is their sick humor. For example, Ollie has to work with LaFontaine, who is not the nicest guy in the world. LaFontaine, regarding driving the ambulence and pedestrians, says, "Haven't killed anyone yet, but, hey, three's a charm" (35). While LaFontaine thinks it is funny, Ollie, along with myself, don't quite think so. I think it really must take a lot for someone to joke so nonchalantly about death. Death must be so present in their life that all they can do is laugh about it. I think that is the case for LaFontaine. It is his way of coping.
One thing however that I think Ollie could and does learn from LaFontaine and the others is to loosen up a little bit. On a call where a teenager was shot in the head, but still walking and talking (aka not dead), the patient told Ollie he had a headache. Ollie responded, "Normally I think our patients are complainers. But in your case, you say you got a headache....Hey, I don't blame you"(48). His partner Rutkovsky tells the others and they think its pretty funny. They even take down the grim reaper picture from Ollie's locker. He is starting to fit in more. I think that is one valuable thing he has learned so far. I know he will learn much more in the coming chapters and I am excited to read ahead.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Black Flies Post #1

I am reading Black Flies by Shannon Burke. It describes the experiences of a man, Ollie, who just started his job of being an EMT. He describes in detail the people, insects, and deaths he witnesses. He descries the scene of a suicide: "The girl had cracked the pavement, indenting it. One leg was bent backward beneath her body. Her head was at a crazy angle. She was completely still"(6). The reader can really picture the scene. It is bizzare and disturbing. Ollie also describes how his partner, Rutkovsky, acts like nothing happened as he gets back into the ambulence and eats his dinner while the mother of the girl pleads with him through the window to save her daughter. All of the "seasoned" medics act in that way. The new medics have to get used to all the death in their lives. The veterans taunt them by calling Ollie "The Coroner" for almost not being able to save a man having an athsma attack and by putting a transfer form in Phelps'(the other newbie) mailbox. They even put a dead dog, covered in maggots, in the drivers seat of his car so it looked like it was driving. Phelps, "...just stood there with his head on the car....I could see his back shaking. He couldn't stop. It went on for ten minutes"(21). First of all, that is absolutely disgusting. I don't even want to imagine what it would be like to have to deal with seeing hurt or dead people every day and then have to deal with a dead dog in your car after work.
This book is really really good so far. It is graphic and they swear fairly regularly but it is really captivating. I didn't think I was going to like it because I don't like blood and guts but it works with the book. It makes the reader understand what it might be like to have to see that in person everyday and how it might affect someone. I would never ever want to be a medic. I am almost 100% certain that by the end of the book, there is going to be no way I would ever become an EMT. Shannon Burke, the author, includes tidbits of interesting medical information between the different emergency calls Ollie and Rutkovsky go on. It is a nice break from the intense situations going on. I am looking forward to seeing if Ollie survives and actually stays with this profession!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Robery Kennedy: His Life Post 6

The book ends with Robert Kennedy finishing hisvictory speech to a crowd of supporters. Tragically, as he turned to look for his wife, Sirhan Sirhan shot him in the head with a .22 caliber pistol. His bodyguard leaped towards the gunman. The crowd was screaming and crying. A woman in a red party dress said, "No, God, no. It's happened again."(391). At 1:44 am on June 6th, 1968, Robert Kennedy was pronounced dead. His brother, Edward Kennedy, gave a eulogy at his funeral. He said,

"My brother need not be idealized, or enlarged in death beyond what he was in life. Rather, he should be remembered simply as a good and decent man, who saw wrong and tried to right it, saw suffering and tried to heal it, saw war and tried to stop it"(393).

These powerful words summed up Robert Kennedy's life. He tried to make the world a better place. He inspired thousands of people to better their lives. He taught his children to love America, but he also showed every American how to: by respecting it's laws and upholding it's ideals even when it's not the popular thing to do. He was an everyday man who did great things. Today, he is buried in Arlington National Cemetary, only 30ft away from his brother, John F. Kennedy. While JFK's grave is elaborate and large, RFK is buried beneath a simple white cross. Americans will forever remember and thank him for the personal sacrifices he made to better our country.